it was an ICE CREAM-Y weekend
my mother in law is just as big an ice cream freak as anyone here ( though i don't think her ICF is very high. she and daddy frighten me. heh. let's not go there...) so she invited the girls and i (and her crabby ass SON if he wasn't in a bitchy mood) to come down to the house and have ice cream. the girls and i were ALL OVER that idea, but the crab ass stayed home. turns out that two of my sisters in law (Jenny and Jessa) and my brother in law (wayne, married to jenny) and their little boys were over for ice cream too. so the kids take off to play while the rest of us are licking our bowls (not licking the bowl clean is ice cream sacrelidge in THAT house) and my sisters in law start talking about some sex show on cable. i dunno the name of the show though, cause my choice was internet access or cable TV. apparently i have my priorities straight dammit.
so my married sister in law starts talking about this guy who called in and wanted to know why everytime he ejaculated he crapped his pants... i never laughed so hard... especially after seeing the look on my mom's face. we usually have to explain this stuff to her. so imagine my surprise when she says, "well maybe they should just have sex on the toilet?"
jenny and jessica wound up WEARING my last mouthful of ice cream.
heh. and then last night i made up for it by eating too many bowls (THREE) of "milky way" candy bar ice cream. nothing like a sugar coma people. plus my ass will eventually be the size of dallas.
About Us
about 
Our Mascot, Alice, may she rest in peace 
It's all Maria's fault. She loves ice cream and uses it to seduce people. And we've all been seduced. By the ice cream, not by Maria. But we've all since realized that ice cream has become an excellent compensation for our sexual frustrations. We even have our own theme song. So here's where we shall describe, in excrutiatingly sensuous detail, our ice cream escapades.
Our Mascot, Alice, may she rest in peace In memoriam:
Tigger
TLIC team bios
Dana Scully. An honorary member. Was seen eating ice cream in the X-Files episode "The Unnatural". Has not yet attended a TLIC social. I don't know if she stirs her ice cream, but she stirs me up on a regular basis. Apparent Favorite: Vanilla cone.
ICF=?
(I'm sure any of us would volunteer to see that it's a 1)
Maria (a/k/a I Am Done). The inspiration for this blog. As with any deity, you cannot gaze upon her countenance, lest you be turned into fat-free plain vanilla frozen yogurt. Likes to stir her ice cream. Favorite: Vanilla.
ICF=5
Leah (a/k/a Bitter). Founder of TLIC and composer of the theme song. Lover of all things chocolate. Don't tell her doctor about this, she has high triglycerides. Sometimes stirs her ice cream, depending. Favorite: Abbott's Chocolate Almond Frozen Custard.
ICF=1
Mary Rose, team hip chick with exotic piercings. Doesn't have her own blog. Never stirs her ice cream. Favorite: Anything with chunky stuff in it.
ICF=1
Cheryl (a/k/a Rose). A Mom, and therefore owns a minivan, which transports team members to their adventures. Nevers stirs her ice cream. Favorite: Caramel Fudge Sundae.
ICF=3
Jessica. The youngest team member, yet has a low ICF, as any fresh, young woman should. Sometimes stirs her ice cream. Favorite: B&J's Fudge Central.
ICF=2
(but only because her gf lives out of town)
Marjorie. Our wickedly funny, quick-witted Michigan team member. I think this is her mug shot from stalking Hanson. Never stirs her ice cream (it doesn't spend that much time in the bowl). Favorite: Crunchy Munchy Peanut Butter.
ICF=5
Julia from Jamestown, NY. Just got married and therefore madly in love, hence the ridiculously low ICF. Stirring NOT allowed. Favorite: Cookies and Cream on a sugar cone.
ICF=1
Nina (a/k/a Pinky). The Graphic Artist from Indiana who has an unnatural fondness for her Mac. Currently being stalked by some psycho. Slightly stirs her ice cream. Favorite: B&J's Pistachio.
ICF=5
Lisa. The massage therapist from Boulder, CO, where they think hemp is a flavor of ice cream. Survived West Nile Virus. Sometimes stirs. Favorite: B&J's Peanut Butter Me Up.
ICF=3
Alan, a/k/a TP (Token Penis). The drummer from Buffalo. Cute, 21, accounting major, and knows how to have fun. Possesses a staggering knowledge of the "adult" culture. Sometimes stirs. Favorite: B&J's Phish Food.
ICF=5 (He's a guy! Always 5!)
A word about ICF
(Ice Cream Factor):
Ice Cream consumption increases with sexual frustration. The higher the ICF, the more ice cream consumed. 'Nuff said.